Before I say anything, let me first clarify that I’m calling it the “Asian” pressure because 1) I’m Asian, and I’m writing from a personal experience, and 2) The people in the story are Asian. I’m well aware that it’s not just an Asian thing, so please feel free to insert_your_label_here.

As you probably already know, the female figure skating Olympics Gold medalist is Kim Yu-Na, from South Korea, and the Silver medalist is Mao Asada, from Japan. They are both gorgeous and talented young women at the lovely age of 19, full of aspiration, determination, skills and talent, and external pressure. Pressure, pressure, pressure.

Watching the Figure Skating event, I couldn’t stop thinking about the enormous weight and burden that these women carry on their shoulders from their country. When I heard about angry letters that Kim Yu-Na would get from her “fans” if she won 2nd place, a wave and anger and sadness washed over me. It felt all too familiar.

When Kim Yu-Na won, I was super happy for her, but then I thought of Mao Asada, and what reaction she will receive for “losing”. I’m reminded now of a funny thing a friend once told me, that his mom considers him a failure because he’s a Computer Scientist and not a Doctor.

When will we stop the blaming and shaming of people that we think *should* do what we want them to do and be where we want them to be? When will we accept things as they are? Is that even remotely a feasible concept?